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Thursday 19 September 2013

Body language secrets that will help you understand what people are truly saying

By Daniel Dunder


Even if you are not saying a word, folk can still learn plenty about what sort of person you are and what you are thinking and feeling. How do other folks do this? By studying your body language. The term body language alludes to the messages you send out with your body gestures and facial expressions.

It's quite vital to learn non-verbal communication so as to actually hear what folks are claiming. Some communication gurus claim that between 5-10% of our communicaton is done through the words we speak. The rest of our messages are conveyed through our body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions. During your entire life you've been sending messages to others through your posture, gestures, and facial expressions. When you were an infant, before you learned how to speak, folks were gazing into your little baby face, looking at your gestures, and listening to your small cries and gurgles, trying to interpret what kind of mood you were in, and what you were trying to say. And you have been reacting to the body language, voice tone, and expressions of the people around you all of your life, even though you might have not been consciously mindful of it.

What sorts of messages are you conveying to others with your body language? Does your body language encourage others to approach you? Or do you subconsciously warn them to keep away? Take a minute to consider how you typically stand or sit when you are with people. What are you doing with your hands? Where are you looking with your eyes? Does your face express interest in the people you are with, or does your face stay a tense, stony mask? When you're sitting down or standing, do you sometimes cross your arms across your chest? If this is your characteristic way of standing or sitting, how do you think people translate this posture? Did you notice that most people will subliminally translate your arms crossed in front of your chest as a signal that you don't want any person to approach you? Only the gutsiest souls are likely to stand up when you adopt this pose.

If you stand roughly, with your chest slumped forward, your shoulders drooping, and your eyes avoiding everybody else, folks are probably going to decide you are extraordinarily depressed or utterly low in confidence. They may fret that making an attempt to talk with you'll be a clumsy experience. When you stand awkwardly, you don't project any sign you are confident in yourself, or that you have any interest in the people around you. Instead you look like you are endeavoring to vanish. No matter how hopelessly you want somebody to come over and befriend you, if your body language projects disinterest in others, it is not highly likely that many people will try to start a conversation with you.

If some body language signals can scare folk away, are there signals that may encourage folks to stand up and approach you? Yes, you can look much more approachable to others if you adopt body language that's open and non threatening. Whether you are sitting down or standing, aim for a posture that is upright and alert, yet relaxed. If you notice that your chest or shoulders are slumping, straighten up. Become aware about the way you are breathing. Does your breath move in and out smoothly? Or does it move with jerky little starts and stops? If you spot you are holding your breath, or breathing in a shallow, jerky manner, this is an indication of anxiety. When you breathe shallowly, you've got to breathe more often, which can increase your appearance of anxiousness. Consciously tell all of the muscles of your body to relax. Use your abdomen to help you breathe smoothly and intensely. Let the bottom part of your lungs fill up with air as well as the top. What are you doing with your hands? If you get nervous in social eventualities, you can feel that irrespective of what you do with your hands, it is the wrong thing. Many individuals who cross their arms in front of their chest are doubtless doing so at least in part because they don't know where else to put their hands.

Stay conscious of and focused on your surroundings and the people around you. If you find yourself tuning out your surroundings, you will start to focus too much on your interior thoughts. This may swiftly increase your anxiety to a uncomfortable level. It is crucial to understand that even when you're not speaking, you're communicating. You want to ensure that you're sending out the message that you want folks to be receiving. Non-verbal communication is something worth considering, and consciously working on improving. It can be a incredible tool, reinforcing what. You need to say, or can lead to confusion it your non-vebal cues are not supporting the words leaving your mouth.




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