People who are codependent are often unaware of how dysfunctional their relationships are. Codependency can be difficult to treat as people have deeply ingrained behavioral traits. They need to find their identity and self-worth from others as they lack this in themselves. In pleasing others and constantly looking for acceptance, they often sacrifice their own mental, emotional and physical health. This can cause a great deal of damage in families.
They often have difficulty with boundaries. They may have weak, blurred boundaries and feel too responsible for the feelings and problems of others. They keep trying to fix the other person and feel rejected if their advice is ignored. On the other hand their boundaries may be too rigid, preventing any real closeness. They often vacillate between being too weak or too rigid.
People-pleasing and care-taking are often used to control and manipulate others as they need them to act in a certain way to make them feel secure. Communication is no longer honest as a result. There is an unhealthy clinging as they depend on their loved ones for fulfillment instead of finding it in themselves. They often give support to their partners at the cost of their own physical, emotional and mental health.
They are afraid of being abandoned or rejected and will stay in a relationship, even if it is abusive. They actually choose a bad relationship over being alone. Low self-esteem, shame, fear of being judged or rejected and feeling trapped are common in such a relationship. Anger and resentment, depression, despair and a sense of hopelessness are other common feelings.
In such a relationship, a partner will often cater to the anxiety of the codependent person. They delude themselves into thinking they are helping but they may just be reinforcing the negative behavior patterns. To repair such a relationship, it is important to set boundaries and for each person to find happiness as an individual.
There is often denial on the part of a codependent person in such a situation. They always feel that the other person or the situation is the real problem. Although some codependents appear needy, others act self-sufficient when it comes to needing help. They will not reach out and ask for help. Behavior habits are deeply ingrained and often difficult to identify and change.
Identifying the codependent nature of the relationship is often the first step. There are many websites today that list the symptoms, making it easier for people to identify that they have this problem. Even when the problem has been identified, it can take long, hard work to address it. There are many professionals who have experience in helping and it may require guidance and support in establishing new patterns of behavior.
One of the best ways of dealing with this problem is for the codependent person to begin to develop self respect. However, this is easier said than done and often involves professional guidance. A problem like this can ruin lives and the sooner it is addressed the better. It starts with awareness of the problem, acceptance that it needs to change and then taking the appropriate action. Seeking professional help is important and there are many people experienced in treating such problems.
They often have difficulty with boundaries. They may have weak, blurred boundaries and feel too responsible for the feelings and problems of others. They keep trying to fix the other person and feel rejected if their advice is ignored. On the other hand their boundaries may be too rigid, preventing any real closeness. They often vacillate between being too weak or too rigid.
People-pleasing and care-taking are often used to control and manipulate others as they need them to act in a certain way to make them feel secure. Communication is no longer honest as a result. There is an unhealthy clinging as they depend on their loved ones for fulfillment instead of finding it in themselves. They often give support to their partners at the cost of their own physical, emotional and mental health.
They are afraid of being abandoned or rejected and will stay in a relationship, even if it is abusive. They actually choose a bad relationship over being alone. Low self-esteem, shame, fear of being judged or rejected and feeling trapped are common in such a relationship. Anger and resentment, depression, despair and a sense of hopelessness are other common feelings.
In such a relationship, a partner will often cater to the anxiety of the codependent person. They delude themselves into thinking they are helping but they may just be reinforcing the negative behavior patterns. To repair such a relationship, it is important to set boundaries and for each person to find happiness as an individual.
There is often denial on the part of a codependent person in such a situation. They always feel that the other person or the situation is the real problem. Although some codependents appear needy, others act self-sufficient when it comes to needing help. They will not reach out and ask for help. Behavior habits are deeply ingrained and often difficult to identify and change.
Identifying the codependent nature of the relationship is often the first step. There are many websites today that list the symptoms, making it easier for people to identify that they have this problem. Even when the problem has been identified, it can take long, hard work to address it. There are many professionals who have experience in helping and it may require guidance and support in establishing new patterns of behavior.
One of the best ways of dealing with this problem is for the codependent person to begin to develop self respect. However, this is easier said than done and often involves professional guidance. A problem like this can ruin lives and the sooner it is addressed the better. It starts with awareness of the problem, acceptance that it needs to change and then taking the appropriate action. Seeking professional help is important and there are many people experienced in treating such problems.
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